Looking Glass Self

What is the looking-glass self?

The looking-glass self is Charles Horton Cooley's account of how imagined social judgments contribute to feelings about ourselves.

Cooley’s three elements

In Human Nature and the Social Order (1902), it includes three elements: imagining how we appear to another person, imagining that person's judgment, and experiencing a self-directed feeling such as pride or shame.

Looking-glass self example

The crucial judgments are imagined. Someone can feel embarrassed because they expect disapproval even when nobody actually disapproves. The concept does not claim that self-concept is a perfectly accurate reflection of other people's opinions.

The three elements in one situation

Imagine speaking in a group and losing your place.

1. First, you picture how you appeared: hesitant and poorly prepared.
2. Second, you imagine the listeners judging you as someone who does not know the subject.
3. Third, you feel ashamed.

You have experienced the sequence even if the listeners thought only that you needed a moment to find your notes.

In Cooley’s account, such imagined appraisals help form social self-understanding. Repeatedly imagining that others see you as unprepared could become part of how you describe yourself. That is an application of the theory, not evidence that the group holds that opinion or that other people determine every part of identity.